30th September, 2017.

Its the end of another month and here’s a quote I found on the internet that I have been obsessed with this whole month:

 

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Where’s One Direction now?

Back at school, my best friend and I, we sat through every lecture discussing nothing other than these five boys. I clearly remember waiting eagerly for their second album, Take Me Home (2012) and getting through boring Economics lectures only by counting off days to the album release.

Then, I also remember being broken hearted when Zayn Malik left, and even more so when they all left each other. Now, technically One Direction is on a “break”, but seeing hows their solo tours are selling out, their songs are hitting off, and how they keep adding more and more shows – (the last One Direction solo show is on till September, 2018), there quite really is no chance of my favourite band coming back together. The only good thing that’s come out of this is the fact that we have tons of new music from all of them.

Here’s seeing how the One Direction boys have done for themselves 7 years after they were put together!

Harry Styles:

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This dimple-faced, curly-haired boy has always been my favourite and it goes without saying that Harry Styles’ new music is my favourite new music! His self-titled album released back in May and has some of the most beautiful music ever. My personal favourites are Two Ghosts and From the Dinning Table.

Niall Horan:

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Niall just released the music video for his new song “Too Much To Ask”, and I have to say, I’m in love! Niall’s released three songs, quite far apart from each other but all of them have been undoubtedly brilliant. Its about time people heard more of Niall’s raspy Irish voice. He also recently announced his album coming in October! (hyperventilating)

Louis Tomlinson:

Louis-Tomlinson-Back-You-Music-Video

Louis’ first single with Steve Aoki was titled “Just Hold On” and quite honestly, it instantly became my favourite song in December, 2016. His second single featured Bebe Rexha and was released a few months back. Its actually taken me a few listens to get used to Bebe Rexha’s voice (Louis’ is perfect!), but now I can truthfully say I listen to Back To You once every day!

Liam Payne:

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From being my second favourite One Direction boy to my least favourite One Direction solo artist, I have to admit that I’ve not really taken to his new style of music. When Liam released Strip That Down amongst all that controversy about the One Direction lyric, (Go read!), it took me ALOT of time to actually start liking the song. I haven’t yet heard his second single, Get Low and quiet frankly, I don’t think I’m going to end up listening to much of Liam’s new music.

Zayn Malik:

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Ever since Zayn left, I was always low key angry at him. How could someone leave such a perfect band that made perfect music? And then he started making comments and giving interviews in which he blatantly stated that he hated being with the band, that he was forced to make the music and that he didn’t really enjoy any part of it. Then, I hated Zayn Malik. How could you say all of that about something that gave you such a great start? Because of this, I never really took to Zayn’s solo career and thus listened to only a handful of songs.
However, his new song with Sia titled “Dusk till Dawn” is actually starting to become one of my favourites. I was quite hesitant in listening to this song, but turns out its actually quite great! And, it has Zayn singing high notes ❤

 

AOL

An Open Letter to the girl who Loved me and died;

Waking up at 6:30 AM in the morning is no joke. A lot of effort goes into prying your eyes open and getting ready for the day. In fact, a lot of effort goes into trying to get more than 5 hours of decent sleep. In such circumstances, being woken up by the continuous ringing of my cellphone at 3:36 AM is not my preferred start to the day. 

Over three long years, I’ve tried my best to forget my ex-roommate’s call at 3:36 AM on the morning of 22nd August. Who wants to be woken up to the news that his best friend from college days was involved in a car accident, and died? Now I know why you always hated people who drove like  nothing mattered – because in that moment, I hated them too. 

When I look back at everything you’ve ever done for me, one single memory stands out. That one seemingly random afternoon when you came up to me and in hushed tones told me you loved me; and all I could say was “But I’ve always seen you as a sister.” You and I, we promised each other that nothing would come in the way of our friendship, that we wouldn’t let the situation get awkward. Fast forward one week and you texted me, “You haven’t even talked to me all week.” I know I didn’t say it then, but know this: It wasn’t that I hadn’t talked to you, it was that I was becoming too much for you. I was taking up all your thoughts and all your time, and now I knew I was taking up all your love. 

Then we drifted apart. You graduated, and I was still here. You knew I hated texting and so you never texted, but you always, always called me up once in a while. I don’t know how to apologize for never picking up. 

I hadn’t talked to you in over 16 months when Sebastian called me up at 3:36 AM in the morning. I’m not kidding when I say that I spent the next 16 hours wondering what I ever did to deserve your love. I treated you as dispensable, when you were, and always will be, the most indispensable person I’ve ever know. You were there when those tall girls with sly smiles broke my heart, and you were there when my anxiety got the better of me. You listened to me complain and rant, and you listened to stories about all my dates. Even when I came up and called you fake, you never left. You stood by me through everything, even when I couldn’t do the same. 

I was always too late in everything. On your birthday that one year, I was the last person to wish you – I know I’m too late to say this but know that my words and actions may have fallen short, but I never stopped caring for you. I never stopped missing you when you graduated and left. I never stopped thinking about calling you and talking to you. 

When you died, I couldn’t help but remember everything about you. Your silly obsession with boybands, your one beer per night policy, you asking me to stop smoking, you. I can’t  help but wonder how many times you cried when we fought, for how long did you wait before texting me after a fight? I know your best friend hated me and I know she felt I didn’t care. But I always did. I never knew I could miss you anymore than how much I missed you when college went on break for 2 months. But it’s been three years, and each day I miss you more. 

You will always be my favourite person to talk to, and I will always hate that boy who made you doubt yourself. And I will still not know how to thank you for every word, every moment, every phone call. 

Yours sincerely,
The boy who took too much and couldn’t give too much.

Living and breathing Harry Styles

The past two weeks of this month, other than all studying and cramming of A LOT of case laws, my two weeks have just been 24 hours everyday of Harry Styles.

I think everyone already knows this – but for someone who doesn’t, I have unreservedly been a huge fan of One Direction for years. And Harry Styles has been my sad, little weakness since I discovered the band in 2012. Harry Styles released his solo album on 12th May (GO LISTEN) and I fell in love all over again.

Starting this Monday (15th May), Harry Styles spent all week on The Late, Late Show with James Corden which meant that every new day it had a ton of new videos for me to drool over and cry about. There’s something unique about being a 20 year old adult and still obsessing over boy band material: You feel no shame whatsoever in making the said boy band material your phone’s wallpaper.

Since the last few days have just been all Harry Styles, I have also been just asking everyone I know to watch the sam videos that I have been watching on repeat all day (also, all night)

Here’s one of my absolute favourite videos of him, singing my favourite song from his album and wearing smashing clothes and making me really emotionally frustrated.

Harry Styles: Two Ghosts

If you haven’t yet listened to the album or haven’t been fully convinced to watch any of the above said beautiful videos, take a look at this;

'The Today Show' Citi Concert Series, New York, USA - 09 May 2017

I mean, do you know of other really, really cute singers today who can pull this off?
Do yourself a favour: Listen to Harry Styles, and then watch the videos and then watch as you transform into an emotional and sexual mess.

Happy Mother’s Day, Mom!

“Mother’s Day is a celebration honoring the mother of the person, as well as motherhood, maternal bonds, and the influence of mothers in society. It is celebrated on various days in many parts of the world, most commonly in the months of March or May.” – This is what wikipedia describes Mother’s Day as.

I personally think Mother’s Day is a lot more than just one day of honouring moms. I think everyday is a just another version of Mother’s Day. If you really think about it, we aren’t doing anything different on Mother’s Day than we’re doing on every other day. Sure, we’ll get her gift, or take her our for a meal, or maybe even cook a meal! But at the end of the day, she’s the one taking out the trash, she’s putting the clothes up for washing, she is doing everything she’s been doing since she became a mother.

Its Mother’s Day (14th May) today here in India, and since I have exams starting from tomorrow, I’m not with my mother. Even though its supposed to be a ‘special day’ for her, I’m 1000000% sure she’s gone running, or cycling now. Then she’ll be back and cook breakfast (and since its a Sunday it’ll be a special breakfast) and she’ll do everything she needs to do.

Happy Mother’s Day, Mom! Please eat some chocolate cake!

In other news,
My mother now writes a blog as well! She’s just started but she’s becoming really dedicated, really quickly. Go check out her blog ❤

Mom’s Blog!

Symphony

Matt dumped his bag on the floor and fell back on his bed. He had barely closed his eyes when his phone started blaring up. Even without picking up he knew it was his best friend, Dan. No one else ever called him, apart from his tutor, or the daycare where he left his sister.

“Dan, we just talked fifteen minutes ago. At school.”, Matt heard some shuffling and then Dan’s slow and shallow breathing. Matt suddenly tensed and sat up on his bed, “Dan? Are you there? Are you okay?” Dan sighed loudly before finally speaking, barely above a whisper, “I’m here. I’m not fine.” The words had barely left Dan’s lips, and Matt was already racing back down the stairs with his bag.

“What’s up, buddy? Talk to me. I’m always here, you know that.”, Matt spoke as he climbed onto his bike and started cycling towards Dan’s foster home. Matt waited patiently as he again heard Dan sighing followed by low sniffling. Matt’s heart broke when he heard his best friend breaking down. True, Matt had only met Dan six months ago, and for most of those six months Dan had been quite and reserved and Matt had practically forced his friendship upon the boy – but Dan meant more to Matt than any other friend had ever. Counting his father and sister out, Dan was the only other human being Matt cared about. Matt and Dan had a weird friendship. Almost when Matt had given up on trying to get Dan to step out of his comfort zone, Dan had taken a plunge out of it and opened up to Matt in a way Matt had never expected him to.

Matt still remembered the first time they had gone swimming together. Dan had complained all throughout the ride to the lake about being a terrible swimmer and when Matt decided they would race from the shore to the depth limit, Dan had beaten him by more than a minute! Fair and Square! Matt was so shocked and so excited that day, so much so that when Dan was changing into fresh clothes Matt had jumped him from behind all to the shock of poor Dan who tried very hard to cover up his arms before Matt could see anything. But Matt had seen it. Matt had seen everything. The scars on his wrist and the blue bruises extending all the way up to his shoulders. Before Matt could have said anything, Dan had angrily pulled his sweatshirt over him and stormed away. It took Matt two whole weeks, a million text messages, innumerable calls and uncountable visits to Dan’s house to get him to finally start talking to Matt again. And when Dan did start talking again, it took all of only five minutes of spending time with Matt for him to start crying and telling him everything.

“Daniel. Dan, you’re still there, aren’t you?”, Matt was trying his best to hide the panic laced under those words as he cycled with all his might to reach Dan. After the line being completely silent for two minutes, Dan suddenly spoke up and Matt almost burst into tears on hearing his voice, “I, I can’t do this anymore.” Matt took deep breaths before replying, “Talk to me, Dan. What are you doing? What’s going through your head right now?” Matt patiently waited for an answer, and his heart almost failed when he heard Dan’s answer.

“My foster father takes sleeping pills, one per night. If I took maybe twenty one might, I wouldn’t have to do this anymore.”

Matt’s head was going into overdrive. He put all his life into peddling as fast as he could. “Dan, listen to me. Remember that day, at the movies? We heard that song that both of us actually liked! We heard it, and we both liked it instantly! C’mon, I know you remember.” “Yeah, that symphony song.”, Dan muttered, almost inaudible.
“Yeah! Symphony song. Remember what I said to you about the symphony song, Dan?”
“You told me to listen to it whenever I felt bad.” “And, what else? I said something else too, I clearly remember.” Dan was completely crying now. Matt could hear it across the receiver and it took everything in him to not break down as well. Matt was mere seconds away from Dan’s house now. But with every second of Dan not replying, Matt was coming closer to a panic attack. Matt threw his bike on the curb, barged into the house and raced up the stairs to Dan’s room, praying with everything that the room was unlocked.

“You said, you said to wait for you. Because you’d always come.”

Tears raced down Matt’s face as he ran over to Dan curled up on the floor with the bottle of pills spread out on the bed above. Matt wrapped his arms around Dan’s body tightly and kept lightly rocking him till Dan moved his own arms to hug Matt back. Matt took a huge sigh of relief as his heart started beating back to normal. “Thank you for always coming.”, Dan whispered as Matt hugged him tighter.