An open letter To my best friend who wants to give up,
I remember when I was crying in the college bathroom over the uncanny, inconsiderate actions of my ex-best friend, you stood right there and reminded me that none of it was worth it. That nothing could ever be worth my tears. No person especially. I want you to remember this everyday when you’re fighting with your roommate, with your mom, with your guy best friend, with anyone really.
I know you’re at that point where you feel like you should just give up and not care about people anymore: that if people are not putting in efforts, why should you? I want you to know that in a year of 365 days, I have this thought on 265 different days. I want to give up on people almost always.
I once read in a survey in the newspaper that many people go through life continuously ejecting people. These people rarely ever succeed. I once read this post online that said that when people change, the most you can do is leave them and the least you can do is forgive them. I want you to know, that after everything I’ve been through and after everything I’ve seen you grow through, I know that you will get through anything life throws at you. I know the last thing you want is some motivation speech but I also know that everything I say, you’ve already said to me.
I wish that for once you would make yourself as happy as you hope to make other people. I sometimes wish that you would stop caring for people with all your might just so you could care for yourself instead. But I know thats not how you are programmed.
I want you to always remember that you are choosing your own destiny day by day, moment by moment. And that you are not giving up even though you say you are – because that is not who you are.
Your best friend who wishes you’d see yourself through her eyes
An Open Letter to the Boy whose friendship I left behind,
I’ve read that if you’ve known someone for longer than seven years, that friendship lasts for a lifetime. Funny how that never seemed to work for us. Its stupid logic and I would love to blame it for everything we lost, but you and I both know that the only reason we lost anything was because of each other.
I’m not lying when I say this – for about 6 months of my life, you were my best friend. My favourite person. My numero uno. I told you everything, I took advice about everything from you and I spent every day looking forward to spending time with you. Sometimes, I like to sit back and blame you for everything. For not texting back, for not giving me the time of the day, for not remembering my birthday. Other days I prefer blaming the circumstances, the environment, the people we were surrounded by. I like to think that I did everything in my power to salvage our friendship, and that you, you did nothing.
The other day I saw you and we smiled at each other. A few minutes later I saw you talking to another girl. My best friend asked me if it bothered me. I said no. But to be honest, it bothered me. It bothered me to think that if everything that happened hadn’t happened, you and I would be talking like this. You and I, we’re okay right now. But if everything that happened hadn’t happened, you and I, we would have been the same.
You once told me that in a run of around 10 years, we’ve had 1 bad year and we’re the better for it. I wish I could agree. I think, one bad year completely destroyed us, and I think we tried to come back, but we really couldn’t. If there is a half year resolution, mine would be that you get the best of everything in life because you deserve nothing less.
Sometimes I can’t help but miss you desperately. Sometimes I can’t believe how powerful one year can be. Most days, I still blame you for giving up on what could have been a lifelong friendship. But after a year of fighting and reflections, I know it wasn’t your fault. Not really. I once read, “People don’t grow apart, they allow themselves to grow apart.”
90% of the time, I want go back in time and erase every fight and every mistake. The other 10% of the time I want to move on, and I want you to move on but never forget that no matter where life takes us, I’ll always be there when you really need me. I’m rooting for my 10%.
The Girl who’s learning to Move On
Jack sighed as he sat down on the park bench. He had no clue how things had reached here. No, scratch that – He knew exactly how. What he couldn’t comprehend at all was how Amy had just assumed that he hadn’t tried. Who was she to make that assumption? Who was she to come up to him and say that he wasn’t trying? If only she knew how much he was really trying.
And what was that question, “Do you want me in your life or not?” Of course he wanted her in his life! What would he do without her constant advice and brilliant solutions? No matter what he did, no matter what he said, no matter what he tried, he end up hurting Amy; and that had really never been his intention. Why would it be? Granted, he wanted to put some distance between the two of them, but purely for her benefit. Jack knew first hand how hard it was to be around someone whom you had unrequited feelings for. He did not want that for Amy. He knew he was the reason for at least 90% of Amy’s tears. Hell, she’d even told him about how stressed he made her day after day, and to be honest, anyone could see it on her face.
Jack stubbed his cigarette out and started scrolling through his messages. Their last fight had been the last straw. Jack had no energy whatsoever left to fight her, or anyone else for that matter. It was about time to let things take their own turn. Jack closed his eyes just for a minute and when he opened them again, he saw Trevor walking towards him. Trevor was Jack’s best friend. Trevor had tried everything to get Amy and Jack back to what they used to be. Trevor had simultaneously been on Jack’s side and on Amy’s side. There was no way Jack would’ve survived without Trevor. Trevor sat down and put his arm around Jack’s shoulders. They sat side by side like that for a few minutes before Jack spoke, “Amy and I fought.” Trevor hummed in response but didn’t say anything. Jack snorted, “You have nothing to say?”
Trevor removed his hand and turned to face him. “I think both of you should just move on. Stop fighting. Stop letting other people dictate the relationship between the two of you. So what if your roommate hates her? So what if her friends don’t talk to you? All of that is background noise. What really matters is that she’s been there for you when you needed her. Just give her space and give yourself some space and everything will be okay. You guys will go back to normal.”
Jack took in Trevor’s words and unlocked his phone. He typed out word to word of what Trevor had just said and hit send. He locked his phone and placed it in the empty space between their legs. In almost two minutes the phone vibrated and both of them looked down at the screen together.
Today was the first day of our three day long college fest, Meraki and to be really, really honest, I’m quite proud of everyone who’s worked for this. Its our first inter college fest and the first day was quite definitely a success.
For most part of the festival, I’m a committee member for Photography and Registration, however I ended up taking part in one of the events today! Now the event was called “Tale in a Tweet” where they’d give you three different words and you had to choose one and write a short tale in 140 characters (inspired by Twitter’s previous 140 character limit!) The three words they gave us were – Nostalgia, faith and Isolate. I chose faith and here’s what I wrote for this really spur of the moment decision of participating!
“Why did you give up on us?”, he asked.
“I didn’t, I just lost faith.”
“Why? I did everything with you.”
“I lost faith when you started doing everything with me and nothing for me.”
An Open Letter to the girl who Loved me and died;
Waking up at 6:30 AM in the morning is no joke. A lot of effort goes into prying your eyes open and getting ready for the day. In fact, a lot of effort goes into trying to get more than 5 hours of decent sleep. In such circumstances, being woken up by the continuous ringing of my cellphone at 3:36 AM is not my preferred start to the day.
Over three long years, I’ve tried my best to forget my ex-roommate’s call at 3:36 AM on the morning of 22nd August. Who wants to be woken up to the news that his best friend from college days was involved in a car accident, and died? Now I know why you always hated people who drove like nothing mattered – because in that moment, I hated them too.
When I look back at everything you’ve ever done for me, one single memory stands out. That one seemingly random afternoon when you came up to me and in hushed tones told me you loved me; and all I could say was “But I’ve always seen you as a sister.” You and I, we promised each other that nothing would come in the way of our friendship, that we wouldn’t let the situation get awkward. Fast forward one week and you texted me, “You haven’t even talked to me all week.” I know I didn’t say it then, but know this: It wasn’t that I hadn’t talked to you, it was that I was becoming too much for you. I was taking up all your thoughts and all your time, and now I knew I was taking up all your love.
Then we drifted apart. You graduated, and I was still here. You knew I hated texting and so you never texted, but you always, always called me up once in a while. I don’t know how to apologize for never picking up.
I hadn’t talked to you in over 16 months when Sebastian called me up at 3:36 AM in the morning. I’m not kidding when I say that I spent the next 16 hours wondering what I ever did to deserve your love. I treated you as dispensable, when you were, and always will be, the most indispensable person I’ve ever know. You were there when those tall girls with sly smiles broke my heart, and you were there when my anxiety got the better of me. You listened to me complain and rant, and you listened to stories about all my dates. Even when I came up and called you fake, you never left. You stood by me through everything, even when I couldn’t do the same.
I was always too late in everything. On your birthday that one year, I was the last person to wish you – I know I’m too late to say this but know that my words and actions may have fallen short, but I never stopped caring for you. I never stopped missing you when you graduated and left. I never stopped thinking about calling you and talking to you.
When you died, I couldn’t help but remember everything about you. Your silly obsession with boybands, your one beer per night policy, you asking me to stop smoking, you. I can’t help but wonder how many times you cried when we fought, for how long did you wait before texting me after a fight? I know your best friend hated me and I know she felt I didn’t care. But I always did. I never knew I could miss you anymore than how much I missed you when college went on break for 2 months. But it’s been three years, and each day I miss you more.
You will always be my favourite person to talk to, and I will always hate that boy who made you doubt yourself. And I will still not know how to thank you for every word, every moment, every phone call.
The boy who took too much and couldn’t give too much.
Matt dumped his bag on the floor and fell back on his bed. He had barely closed his eyes when his phone started blaring up. Even without picking up he knew it was his best friend, Dan. No one else ever called him, apart from his tutor, or the daycare where he left his sister.
“Dan, we just talked fifteen minutes ago. At school.”, Matt heard some shuffling and then Dan’s slow and shallow breathing. Matt suddenly tensed and sat up on his bed, “Dan? Are you there? Are you okay?” Dan sighed loudly before finally speaking, barely above a whisper, “I’m here. I’m not fine.” The words had barely left Dan’s lips, and Matt was already racing back down the stairs with his bag.
“What’s up, buddy? Talk to me. I’m always here, you know that.”, Matt spoke as he climbed onto his bike and started cycling towards Dan’s foster home. Matt waited patiently as he again heard Dan sighing followed by low sniffling. Matt’s heart broke when he heard his best friend breaking down. True, Matt had only met Dan six months ago, and for most of those six months Dan had been quite and reserved and Matt had practically forced his friendship upon the boy – but Dan meant more to Matt than any other friend had ever. Counting his father and sister out, Dan was the only other human being Matt cared about. Matt and Dan had a weird friendship. Almost when Matt had given up on trying to get Dan to step out of his comfort zone, Dan had taken a plunge out of it and opened up to Matt in a way Matt had never expected him to.
Matt still remembered the first time they had gone swimming together. Dan had complained all throughout the ride to the lake about being a terrible swimmer and when Matt decided they would race from the shore to the depth limit, Dan had beaten him by more than a minute! Fair and Square! Matt was so shocked and so excited that day, so much so that when Dan was changing into fresh clothes Matt had jumped him from behind all to the shock of poor Dan who tried very hard to cover up his arms before Matt could see anything. But Matt had seen it. Matt had seen everything. The scars on his wrist and the blue bruises extending all the way up to his shoulders. Before Matt could have said anything, Dan had angrily pulled his sweatshirt over him and stormed away. It took Matt two whole weeks, a million text messages, innumerable calls and uncountable visits to Dan’s house to get him to finally start talking to Matt again. And when Dan did start talking again, it took all of only five minutes of spending time with Matt for him to start crying and telling him everything.
“Daniel. Dan, you’re still there, aren’t you?”, Matt was trying his best to hide the panic laced under those words as he cycled with all his might to reach Dan. After the line being completely silent for two minutes, Dan suddenly spoke up and Matt almost burst into tears on hearing his voice, “I, I can’t do this anymore.” Matt took deep breaths before replying, “Talk to me, Dan. What are you doing? What’s going through your head right now?” Matt patiently waited for an answer, and his heart almost failed when he heard Dan’s answer.
“My foster father takes sleeping pills, one per night. If I took maybe twenty one might, I wouldn’t have to do this anymore.”
Matt’s head was going into overdrive. He put all his life into peddling as fast as he could. “Dan, listen to me. Remember that day, at the movies? We heard that song that both of us actually liked! We heard it, and we both liked it instantly! C’mon, I know you remember.” “Yeah, that symphony song.”, Dan muttered, almost inaudible.
“Yeah! Symphony song. Remember what I said to you about the symphony song, Dan?”
“You told me to listen to it whenever I felt bad.” “And, what else? I said something else too, I clearly remember.” Dan was completely crying now. Matt could hear it across the receiver and it took everything in him to not break down as well. Matt was mere seconds away from Dan’s house now. But with every second of Dan not replying, Matt was coming closer to a panic attack. Matt threw his bike on the curb, barged into the house and raced up the stairs to Dan’s room, praying with everything that the room was unlocked.
“You said, you said to wait for you. Because you’d always come.”
Tears raced down Matt’s face as he ran over to Dan curled up on the floor with the bottle of pills spread out on the bed above. Matt wrapped his arms around Dan’s body tightly and kept lightly rocking him till Dan moved his own arms to hug Matt back. Matt took a huge sigh of relief as his heart started beating back to normal. “Thank you for always coming.”, Dan whispered as Matt hugged him tighter.
I WROTE A THIRD PART YOU GUYS! I LOVED LOVED LOVED HOW THIS STORY WAS GOING AND THEN I FIGURED, HEY, I COULD POSSIBLY WRITE ANOTHER PART, RIGHT?
DON’T FORGET TO READ THE FIRST TWO THOUGH:
(I promise you guys will love it!)
After two hours of the economics lecture were finally over, she took a deep breath and opened the small piece of paper she had been clutching since what felt like forever.
The paper had a few words scribbled on it followed by a phone number.
This what it. This was what she’d wanted since the time she lay eyes on him. In a spilt second decision, she flipped open her phone and punched in the number from the piece of paper. The line barely rang and he picked up.
“Hello?”, she could feel her heart beating so loudly when she heard his voice.
“Saif?”, she half-whispered into the phone.
“Elevator girl.”, he replied, a smile creeping on his face, “So, tell me your name now at least.”
She smiled into the receiver, “Reyna.”
“So, Reyna, care to accompany me to the bookstore around the corner?”
“Today. What time do your classes end?”
“Four it is, then! See you later, elevator girl.”
As Saif said goodbye, Reyna felt herself smiling widely. She could get used to this happy, giddy feeling. She could definitely get used to it. As the next lecture started, more than ever, Reyna couldn’t wait for classes to end.
The clock struck four, and Reyna started feeling panicky. What if he found her boring? What if he never showed up? She sighed and walked out and then stopped dead when she saw him standing there, scrolling through his phone.
She walked over to him, “Hi.”, she drew in a sharp breath as he looked up and smiled beautifully at her. “Reyna! Finally! Let’s get going.”, he said, pushing his phone in his pocket and motioning her to follow him.
“What are you studying then?”, Saif asked her as she fell into place next to him. “Double major in Economics and English Literature. And you?”
“Majoring in Mechanical Physics. I’ve never understood a single word of Shakespeare.”
“I’ve never understood a single word of Newton.”, Reyna replied, nudging him sideways.
They walked in silence for the next three minutes and Reyna treasured it more than anything she had ever treasured in life. “How did you break your hand?”, she asked him suddenly.
Saif turned sideways to face her, “Well, uh, my girlfriend and I, we had gone cycling and while trying to impress her, I let go of the bars of the cycle and quite literally, went tumbling down the hill.”
Reyna chuckled softy, “Really?” “Really. Well, except she’s now my ex-girlfriend.”, Saif replied staring straight at Reyna’s eyes with those deliciously beautiful brown eyes of his making Reyna go weak everywhere.
When I wrote the first part, I never thought there would be a second part. I remember writing the first one and being extremely proud of myself. Yesterday, when I was re-reading it(yes, I do that!), I had a brilliant idea about a second part and thus here I am! Now obviously, you NEED to read the first part that I wrote last year to understand this second one, so here you go: The Boy In The Elevator (This is what I call shameless self publicity, high five!)
She mentally cursed the watchman. Honestly, she attended this college everyday. He saw her everyday! Why did he have to ask her for her Id card today of all days? She groaned as she started emptying out the contents of her bag. She stole a glance at the clock on her phone. 8:07 AM. She hated being late for her favourite professor’s lecture.
When she finally handed him the required card with a triumphant look on her face, she heard a soft laugh next to her. She turned around sharply to see who it was. But it couldn’t be! It was him! It had been three months. How could it even be him? She just stood there, staring at him as he continued giggling at the mess she had made. She tried clearing her throat to get his attention but clearly her body wasn’t functioning like it ought to.
It was then he looked up. And when their eyes met, it was like two worlds had collided. No exaggeration. She saw the beautiful brown-eyed, former broken-handed stranger’s pupils widen and then saw his phone crash to the floor with a thud. None of them moved to pick it up, and then finally another kid passing by picked it up and gave it to them, breaking their eye contact. She shook her head and started throwing all her things into her bag. He just stood there watching her.
When she was done, she turned around and was surprised to see still him standing there. “I’m awfully late for class.”, she muttered as she started moving towards the elevator. “I’ll walk you to class.”, he announced. She had never realised how unbelievably slow the elevators at the university were. This one just refused to come down! The three minutes she spent waiting for it, were the longest three minutes of her life. None of them spoke a word, but she could silently feel his eyes running over her again and again. “I can feel you staring.”, she whispered, loud enough only for him. “Just like you were staring at me outside that conference room?”, he whispered back sending a jolt through her body.
As the elevator reached her floor, she practically raced out of the box. “Why didn’t you ask for my name?”, he asked loudly, following her. She shut her eyes, ignored him and continued walking ahead. She could still clearly remember it. All parts of it. The chemistry they’d had and the way when she was talking to him and she’d felt at home. But she also remembered the disappointment. “You could’ve asked for mine.”, she replied softly, without slowing down or turning to look at him. When he didn’t reply, she turned around. And he was nowhere to be seen.
She felt her heart panic. Had she lost the beautiful stranger again just because she was stubborn? Was this really happening to her? She looked around frantically for a minute or so, and then resigned herself to the fact that she was now definitely not going to see the beautiful stranger again. Three months, and she felt her heart getting crushed at the thought of losing him again. “I didn’t ask for yours because I felt it inappropriate.”, she turned around and saw him standing there, ever so beautiful, with two cups of coffee in his hand, and one outstretched towards her.
“I didn’t ask for yours because I saw your girlfriend.”, she spoke between sips of the warm coffee. He looked straight at her with those brown eyes and she felt more at home than ever. He gulped down the remaining bits of his coffee, opened his bag, removed a stray piece of paper, hastily scribbled something down and handed it to her without a single word. “You have a class to get to.”, he remarked as he took her empty cup from her hand. As he said those words, she zapped out of her trance, smiled slowly at him and watched as he started walking away. “I’ll see you around.”, he called out and she knew, she knew he was smiling that beautiful smile she found herself grinning at.
So I had this up on my wattpad account, and for the past month I’ve been feeling really sad and more sad because I miss the boy I like(and I haven’t seen him in a year), and I just would really like to see him again.
And here’s the link to my wattpad account: https://www.wattpad.com/user/FredGeorgeANDSirius
Isabella sat waiting under the huge banyan tree. She looked around at the place she had called home for ten years before going away. She had missed it. It was a beautiful city, with beautiful people and she had had a beautiful life. She had missed it so much. She had missed him.
Isabella looked down at her wrist watch. It was just over 8:00 in the evening. She remembered all those evening walks they had taken, and all those times they had sat down under that very tree. She felt her eyes fill up and she wiped the tears away. “Isabel?”
She looked up at him. His eyes bore down at her and she felt guilt like she never had in the past three years. “Steven, Hi.”, she muttered as she sat down next to her. They sat quietly for a while and she could feel him tensing up next to her. She held back tears. When was the last time he hadn’t been comfortable around her?
“How have you been? How’s Marissa?”, she asked, slightly wincing at the last word but not looking up at him. “Three years, Isabel. You left. And you want to know how’s Marissa ?”, he said almost shouting. Isabella looked up at him. Ever since she had left the city, left Steven, she had apologized a million times. She knew it wasn’t enough. It was never going to be enough. “I’m sorry. Really. More than you’ll ever know. I was a kid. I panicked, and I know no apology will ever be enough okay? But I’m here now, and I know I don’t deserve a second chance, all I really want is to apologize for one last time.” “Last time?”, he asked looking straight at her with his deep blue eyes. But they had no love, no sympathy. And it hurt more than she had ever imagined. Just sitting there and looking at him, knowing he had zero love left for her, hurt every single bone in her body. “Yeah,”, she replied quietly,”I just came back to talk to you. I’m leaving for my new job day after, in London.” “Okay”, he said nodding.
“Dad!”, Isabella looked up to see an adorable kid with brown hair run towards them. She raced over and sat in Steven’s lap. Steven kissed her forehead lightly and she looked towards Isabella with those same deep blue eyes. “Hi! I’m Isabella!”, the kid said looking over at Isabella. And Isabella felt her world collapse. She wanted to grin back but there was a lump in her throat. She stared at the girl and she stared at Steven. And this time she couldn’t stop the tears. They rolled down her cheeks softly. Steven whispered something in his daughter’s ears and she raced off towards the building.
“I loved you. You know I loved you. I would have done anything for you.”, he spoke quietly. She nodded wiping her tears off. She had loved him too. Isabella looked up at the sky. Three years ago she had had a perfect life. She had a boyfriend she loved and a job she loved. Its what she had always wanted. But she had left. Left it all behind. And now as she sat next to him, she couldn’t remember why. She shook her head slightly,”I’ve got to go, Steven, I need to go.”, and with that she got up. He looked towards her with those beautiful eyes,”Don’t be a stranger.”, he whispered, and with a kiss on her cheek, he let her go.